


Walls Crumble

by englishmuff



Category: Six - Marlow/Moss
Genre: Kat's only mentioned, a lot of jane angst, have fun, i may or may not be projecting, i wrote this in 15 minutes as a vent, idk man, jane angst, so are the other queens
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-20
Updated: 2020-03-20
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:08:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23224537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/englishmuff/pseuds/englishmuff
Summary: Jane is just tired. She's fine, really.
Comments: 6
Kudos: 47





	Walls Crumble

**Author's Note:**

> bro, idk. feeling the trauma today, and jane was ripe for the projecting. i write things other than angst, i promise. but this is not it. not my best work.

Jane was fine.  
She cooked and cleaned. She was there for the queens when they needed her. She helped Kat and Anne through the memories, Anna and Cathy through the guilt and Aragon through the confusion. She was happy to do so, really. But as hard as she tried, she couldn't open up. Couldn't let down her walls and tell the queens how much she had been hurting. Couldn't force herself to speak a single word when the topic of Henry came up, outside the show. Couldn't sleep, because every time she closed her eyes, he was there, playing with her, grooming her. Couldn't tell Kat 'no' when she had taken to calling her 'mum', even when every time she heard it, she was reminded of Eddie's cries, and went back to the time when everything she did was scrutinized. Couldn't speak her mind about even what show to watch, couldn't bear anyone touching her outside the occasional hug.  
Couldn't  
Couldn't  
Couldn't  
She became detached.  
Her movement didn't feel like her own. She cooked and cleaned. She was there for the queens when they needed her. She helped Kat and Anne through the memories, Anna and Cathy through the guilt and Aragon through the confusion. She was obliged happy to do so. She smiled when it felt like it was impossible, and when she truly was not able to smile, she passed it off as,  
"I'm fine, just tired."  
Smiling became less and less common. Jane knew the other queens were getting worried. Even the fans had noticed her Heart of Stone was lacking in emotion. Just like her. She felt like a shell of a human, pushing away the fire that burned in the others in favor of the empty chill that had become comforting.  
"Don't worry about me, just tired."  
The queens called in an alternate so she could stay home and rest. But she didn't. She stared at the wall until her vision blurred. She was humming a song she didn't know to herself. The queens came back. She assured them she was fine.  
“That’s our Jane!”  
“You’re basically perfect, I swear!”  
“Love you, mum!”  
She smiled. Henry liked her complacent and perfect. Obviously, the queens would too. She turned back to the wall and ignored the conversation of Jane’s great ability to stay positive.  
It’s all a lie.  
It’s all a façade.  
Soon they’ll find out about your emptiness.  
They’ll find your faults.  
Jane left late that night, after tucking each one into bed one way or another. She was tired of being there for others. Tired of being complacent. Tired of being perfectly positive and positively perfect. She drove to the theater and sang everything out. It started off shaky, but with each word she grew louder, until she wasn’t completely sure if she actually left her mic off or not. She sang of her being sick and tired of caring for others. She sang of her regret that she never spoke her mind, even though it was impossible for her to do so. She sang of hating being looked up to, and how she just wanted everything to go away, forever. She sang, and when her voice got hoarse, she screamed weakly. Anything to get the bottled up emotions out into the world. Exhausted, she fell asleep, unaware of the queens sitting in the back of the auditorium, shocked. They decided to leave her be. They now knew this was the first time she got any real sleep in weeks. They now knew not to glorify her so much. They now knew to give her space. They were sad but determined to help her mum, no, friend. No one’s mum. Not anymore.

**Author's Note:**

> yeah, sorry. maybe check out my tumblr, @thatenglishmuffin ? thanks for reading!


End file.
